Remember when I applied for that job at Marshall's, and I was waiting to hear from them?

Well, I've heard. I didn't get the job. Why, you may ask?

I failed the personality test.

I shall pause for you to recover from the fit of laughter that is undoubtedly consuming you. No, don't rush on my account. I'll wait here.

All set? Ok.

Apparently, when they ask you if you think most people steal, and you say yes, they assume that YOU are MOST PEOPLE.

I never for a moment thought that rigorous honesty would come back to bite me in the ass in this particular way. I must be way more naive than I thought I was. Or stupider.

I am now considered unfit to run a register at a discount department store. Oh, the humanity.